This is my hypothesis: that, just like our tastes for fats and sweets evolved under conditions of nutrient scarcity, and are probably harmful in an environment of abundance (hence, the obesity epidemic in America and elsewhere), so our social instincts evolved under conditions of life-long relationships with 150-or-so people are not well suited to a media environment driven by anonymously (or semi-anonymously) produced viral "content". I think this hypothesis accounts for a lot of our social ills, including social atomization, group polarization, and ego fragility, with the result that our social fabric is somewhere between frayed and shredded. Society is going off the rails because we, the people who make up society, by-and-large, have not adapted well to our new environment. I'll be straight, I don't like making sweeping statements as a rule, but I think these ills are just getting worse, and unless something is done to address the trends, I fear we're just going to come apart at the seams, in an ugly way. Avoiding that requires us to be better: more emotionally resilient, more willing to listen, more inclusive. We can do this, but, like keeping relatively physically healthy requires some combination of nutritional awareness, diet, and exercise, it will take work. Maintaining intellectual and, if I can say, spiritual health requires a similar program: In the same way that we have to understand our physiological biases to design an effective nutritional diet, we have to understand our emotional and cognitive biases, and the incentives of those who produce and deliver our media, to design an effective media diet; and in the same way that physical health is promoted by physical exercise, intellectual, emotional, and spiritual health also requires analogous forms of exercise: we need to seek out, process, and produce material that enriches us, and avoid that which panders to us.
First talking about media diet, we should appreciate that media content / distribution will have a lot to do with the incentives of its producers and distributors. To understand the biases present in the information we consume, we should understand the incentives of those involved in getting that information to us, as well as our own cognitive biases (which any motivated communicator may attempt to exploit). This is a deep subject, well worth exploring, and I might say more about it later. This post, though, is ultimately intended to help change behavior, so I'd rather talk about practice than theory for now.
Facebook, Twitter, Google, et al., determine what we see based on "relevance", or "engagement". The platforms that many of us rely on to keep us informed deliberately manage the information they present to us, based on what the platform believes we're looking for. This isn't nefarious, in fact it's broadly helpful. But it does end up leading to a feedback loop, where the things you respond to determine what you see. And when these things you're looking for are a matter of public debate, the usual result will be that you see things that won't cause you much discomfort, and you'll see what reinforces, rather than challenges, your preexisting beliefs. As this process repeats over time, we can invisibly become less tethered to an underlying reality, we can become more and more extreme. And when this process repeats in a social network, which we use (in part) to stay in touch with our social circle, our natural desire to be part of a community compounds this process still further.
The good news is that we can fight this process as individuals: we don't need Facebook to change its business model, we can adapt to it. Facebook optimizes your newsfeed for "engagement", so try to engage with more nuanced content. Avoid sharing or liking simplistic memes, share and like media that respects your intelligence, and that respects the intelligence of those who disagree with you, or that encourages sympathy for alternative points of view. Hopefully you will start seeing more such media, and you won't drift as easily from "consensus reality". Similarly, we don't need Google to change its business model, we can adapt to it. Google optimizes its search to be relevant to you, but you can - to an extent - ask Google not to do so for politically charged topics by browsing in "private" or "incognito" mode when you perform such searches. The results you get back should be less tailored to you, more representative of society. As far as Twitter goes... Well, it's designed to prevent nuance, so I kind of think that over-using twitter will probably make you a worse person. Sorry.
So the above is about media diet, but I also want to say something about intellectual / emotional / spiritual exercise. The following are principles that I, personally, use to try to preserve a sympathetic outlook in a coarsened media environment. I like to think that keeping these ideas and associated practices core helps me to keep my balance, keeps me from going off the rails.
People are people. Sure, there is a lot of human variation, but there is a much larger volume of features we all share, and those common features will explain a much larger amount of our behavior. There are two specific implications of this tenet that inform much of my own ideology: First, that even those who do things we see as evil are motivated by feelings we'd recognize in ourselves (we can understand our enemies); Second, that feelings we recognize in ourselves can lead to evil (we must care for our souls).
This is a paraphrase of some advice Bob Trivers' advisor gave him for some of his early research: "Never assume that the animal under study is as stupid as the one studying it." Anything widespread in nature probably exists for some reason, and if I don't know what that reason is, that's more likely due to ignorance or lack of imagination on my part, than it is that "people are crazy". Any hypothesis that fails the "people are people" test is almost certainly inadequate. Work harder to understand.
We often don't know our own motivations. There are a lot of studies demonstrating that we are much more prone to rationalizing than we are to reasoning. Self-reported rationales for choices and behavior are valuable, but should be viewed with some skepticism.
"I could be wrong." Of everything I've written, this might be the most important, but it's also a double-edged sword: people tend to trust the confident, but it's easy -- and often beneficial -- to have or to project confidence in things that are simply wrong. (Otherwise, there would be no con-men.) "Good" confidence, in my view, comes when an idea is challenged and remains standing. "Good" confidence tolerates and encourages doubt, understanding that surviving challenge increases credibility. I don't follow this perfectly, but in principle, I try to ask myself about all of my ideas, "What would the world look like if I am wrong?" I look for evidence to confirm or refute my hypotheses, or at least I try to remain open to such evidence. And if I find myself changing a hypothesis at every challenge, that could be a sign that the hypothesis is wrong, and I should think harder and listen better.
This is a lot of text, and if you've made it this far, thank you. I'm writing this because I'm afraid of how society seems to be changing (more of a concern with young kids); because it seems like this framing and this approach might help some of us to find ways to be more sympathetic and open; because if enough of us can communicate with each other again, then perhaps the social fabric won't end up completely undone; and because I haven't seen this point made elsewhere. If you disagree, please comment (after all, "I could be wrong"). If you agree, please help spread the word. I'm an imperfect messenger, I've got significant distrust of social media (if I trusted social media, I'd probably be full of righteous anger, but that's not conducive), but still, please like and share.